An Anorexic Looks at a Biscuit

An example of anorexic overthinking:

  1. To eat the gorgeously yummy ginger biscuit is to give in to appetite; to indulge. You must resist it to show strength.
  2. But not to eat it is not to embrace recovery, to stay in your holt curled up and quivering with fear. It is to give in to anorexia and you must resist that, which is good because it means you get to taste that sweet and lovely gingeryness.
  3. But you suspect you are just using the sanctimonious language of wanting to recover as an excuse to get the biscuit, to indulge your sybaritic, luxurious weakness for biscuits, so you should resist the urge to eat biscuits, as a demonstration of strength of character.
  4. But that sounds like the treacherous mendacity of the disease whispering insidious un-logic into your ear, so you should resist that and eat the biscuit.
  5. Surely you can keep your hands off one little biscuit for five minutes, you spineless shit?! Resist it!
  6. Are you mad? It’s one little biscuit. What harm can it do? Eat it, enjoy it, move on.
  7. Eat it. Eat it.
  8. Don’t eat the biscuit.
  9. Eatthebiscuit. Resistthebiscuit.
  10. eat resist eat resist.
  11. Eatdon’teatdon’t Eatdon’teatdon’t Eatdon’teatdon’t.
  12. biscuitbiscuit biscuitbiscuit biscuitbiscuit biscuitbiscuit
  13. Bisbisbisbisbis bisbisbisbisbis bisbisbisbisbis
  14. Bisbisbisbisbis bisbisbisbisbis bisbisbisbisbis bisbisbisbisbis bisbisbisbisbis
  15. Bis bis.

Coda:

I’ve got it! I’ll have half the biscuit! (Let’s avoid the word “eat”.)

Or a quarter.

 

Or an eighth.

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